What’s New to Stream on Amazon Prime for December 2022

Crossing the Streams is our series of guides looking at all the offerings hitting the big streaming services each month. This time we’re checking out what’s new to streaming on Amazon Prime in December 2022, including Nanny, Basic Instinct 2, and more!

Amazon Prime Pick of the Month for December 2022

The Sundance Film Festival has been home to more than a few premieres of acclaimed horror films, including The Blair Witch Project, Hereditary, Get Out, and The Witch, to name a few. One of the genre films to make a big splash at this year’s festival was Nikyatu Jusu’s Nanny (Prime Original, premieres December 16th), which was promptly picked up by Amazon. The film follows a Senegalese immigrant (Anna Diop) working as a nanny for a wealthy woman (Michelle Monaghan) in New York City. There’s an evil afoot, one supernatural and/or social in nature, and the film reportedly milks slow-burn terror and unease from the premise. The film had a limited theatrical release last month, but it goes wide on Prime this month.

Sequels You Didn’t Know Existed

Remember that iconic scene in Paul Verhoeven’s Basic Instinct? The one with Sharon Stone? Where she chops up the ice with the pick? Anyway, fourteen years later, Catherine (Stone) is back in the crosshairs of men who should really know better. Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction (2006) obviously pales beside the first film with a script that can’t find similar highs (or lows), lacks the chemistry of Stone and Michael Douglas in sleaze mode, and just lacks any sense of fun or thrills. Michael Caton-Jones is no Verhoeven, and David Morrissey is no Douglas. But hey, now you can see it and judge for yourself!

Universal has a long history of making direct-to-video sequels to some of its biggest hits. None so far have improved upon the originals, but some manage to deliver some fun all the same. Kindergarten Cop 2 (2016, on freevee) is one of the latter, as it’s actually an entertaining time. To be sure, the formula is pretty much identical with Dolph Lundgren stepping into Arnold Schwarzenegger’s shoes as a member of law enforcement who goes undercover as a kindergarten teacher. It’s not nearly as funny, of course, and the action is smaller scale compared to Ivan Reitman’s hit. But as minor diversions go, it’s fine.

Movies That Are Far Better Than You Claim

Michael Bay’s filmography has a few critically acclaimed titles, but for the most part, he’s a populist director giving the people what they want. The Island (2005, on freevee), though, was unwanted by both critics and audiences alike. An unacknowledged riff on Michael Marshall’s excellent novel Spares, the film sees a pair of clones escape into the real world with action-packed consequences. It’s every bit as cheesy as other Bay films, and its action sequences are stellar — so why the hate? Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson are both solid leads, and the supporting cast rocks with Sean Bean, Djimon Hounsou, and Steve Buscemi. Give it another shot, people!

Look at most people’s rankings of the franchise, and far too many of them put Mission: Impossible III (2006, on freevee) towards the wrong end of the list. Part of it is probably due to recency bias, as Christopher McQuarrie’s tenure over the next three has gifted fans with higher-profile thrills. And maybe some people just hate J.J. Abrams. But that aside, what’s to hate here? The action is strong — that bridge attack alone is a stunner — and it’s the only entry to deliver real emotional stakes throughout. Add to that a series-best villain in Philip Seymour Hoffman, and you have an absolute gem that deserves more love from franchise fans.

While quality action and suspense are pretty clear to identify, comedy is far trickier, as what makes me laugh might leave you bored. Case in point? The Watch (2012, on freevee) looked like a can’t-miss project with comedically proven stars (Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Jonah Hill, Richard Ayoade, Will Forte) and filmmakers (Akiva Schaffer, Seth Rogen), but everyone hates it. Well, everyone but me. What can I say, this cast dealing with an alien menace just delivers plenty of fun in my eyes. Some laughs, some action, some sci-fi shenanigans — it’s fun!

Movies That Aren’t Nearly as Good as You Think

I’m nothing if not fair-minded, so now let’s look at some new arrivals that some of you inexplicably like. First off? A sequel to one of John Carpenter’s many phenomenal films from the 70s and 80s. Escape from L.A. (1996) should have worked, in theory, as everything about the character, the star (Kurt Russell), and Carpenter’s abilities is exciting. And yet… it’s an unashamed ripoff of the earlier film. Carpenter copies himself, beat for beat, character for character, but does a lazy job along the way. Yes, I know his budget was slashed partway through, but while that explains the horrendous special effects, it doesn’t excuse the copycat script. If Escape from New York is super cool, Escape from L.A. is super lame.

Just as John Carpenter’s directorial talents seemed to dry up after a stellar run, so did Cameron Crowe’s. Say Anything, Jerry Maguire, Almost Famous, Vanilla Sky — all bangers, and then? Freaking Elizabethtown (2005). Doubt his dwindling talent pool? He’s only made We Bought a Zoo and Aloha since! Elizabethtown is the first big step in that fall, though, with its dull tale of a man who returns home to discover his true self. Orlando Bloom is simply out of his depths here with a script that isn’t doing him any favors on either the comedic or dramatic side of things. Kirsten Dunst is innocent, obviously.

Last but not least, while I get the appeal of Cloverfield (2008), I simply cannot abide the love for it. A big monster movie? Yay, of course, but the choice to make it found footage seals its fate as it makes all of the format’s biggest blunders. I can forgive some of them, but please tell me, under what circumstance would you film your friends (or anyone else) instead of the giant goddamn monster rampaging nearby? There are literal scenes where our cameraman is filming the creature — then turns to focus on his friends talking. What?!

The Complete Amazon Prime List for December 2022

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